Brave

Courage like a lion
When winter roars in
Bravery of blackness
And of silence, too

Icicles as icy as fear
Rain hitting my face
As I ran from time, from life
Struggles, tears

They pelted my face
The raindrops
Pain ruled me
As I look back in the past
Now I see

My soul was quiet
Finally
My brain chattered on
Kept me company

I looked at the sky
Wished on the stars
Saw the horizon sink

I can’t give up,
I thought as I floated away
So I fought, I paddled, I screamed

I was sinking
But I couldn’t break
Patience would win
A battle against pain.

My soul howled with the wind
As it carried me away
That beautiful night.

Middle School

I am going into sixth grade this year, and that means...middle school! I am kind of excited, especially to see my friends again. But I’m nervous, too. Mostly I’m nervous for PE because in school, that’s probably my biggest challenge. To me, PE feels like a massive obstacle right now. I have an APE—adapted physical education—teacher who modifies PE activities to make them easier for me. I know you’re probably thinking, That’s a good thing, right? And it is, in some ways. The problem is, an extra PE coach hovering around me makes the other kids stare at me like, What’s wrong with her? Why does she need an extra PE coach?  And I hate that, because some other kids think that I can’t see them staring at me. But I can. I know that they’re staring at me. There is a good thing, though. The good thing is that I have a lot of my friends in my PE class. They know that I have feelings and they’re too nice to stare at me. They wouldn’t really care that I have an extra PE coach. I’m so glad I have such awesome friends!
  Another problem is that after my Botox injection, my physical therapist wants to cast me. The casts are thick and itchy. They’re uncomfortable and it makes school even harder. The casts make me feel like I’m a magnet for kids’ eyes.
   However, the bright side is that everyone can sign my casts if they want to. That makes my casts look a little better than just plain white, at least. I guess the worst part is the comments. One time I was walking in Home Depot with my casts, and one lady was like, “Honey, you broke both of your legs?! My goodness!” That was so embarrassing. My casts help my legs, and that’s a good thing. If casts will help, then I’ll learn to get through it.

Geaux Strong

This summer, I signed up for a swimming program called Geaux Strong. It was for kids with physical challenges. We each got a buddy to swim with who would help us with kicking, arm exercises, and swimming in general. My buddy was the best this year! She was really caring and kind, and also really fun to hang out with. We would joke around and we had competitions together. She made things that usually aren’t very fun for me, like arm exercises, fun.
  Geaux Strong was also a really good place to make friends with other kids. It was a really accepting atmosphere that was supportive and also just really fun. When we did team relay races, everyone would be rooting for everybody. It was awesome.
    So I was really sad when it ended, but one good thing was that my buddy and I stayed in touch. We e-Mail and send each other letters. It’s kind of like having a really positive older sister. So Geaux Strong was really fun. I definitely want to do it next year!

Purple Independence

I was so excited! My physical therapist had nominated me for a bike!

The McLindon Foundation provided the bike for me after St. Jude’s Apostle School raised money for it. They presented it to me at St. Jude’s Apostle School and even made a tunnel for me to ride it through! Afterwards, I addressed the whole school, saying how thankful I was for the bike and the fact that the school raised money for it. My heart was pounding and I was shaking the entire time. After that, I was interviewed by WAFB and the story was put on the news that night! It was such an exciting day!
   I felt so grateful to all of them, but I also felt happy for other reasons. Now I had my own bike—a purple one, my favorite color! I felt like I had independence. Now I could go my own pace. And I wouldn’t fall off because of the bike’s three wheels!
   My bike is so much more to me than just a bike. It allows me to spend time with my family when we go biking. My own bike means that I can keep up with everyone else. And that is one reason why I named my bike Purple Independence.
   Another reason is that I had always ridden on a tandem bike that my dad controlled. Now I was in control, and it felt great! I loved the feeling of the wind rushing in my face. I controlled everything my bike did. Me...In control! That meant for me, independence. Purple Independence! 

Different

Wouldn’t it be amazing
If I walked in the door
and didn’t have to worry anymore
About the teasing,
The stares, the titters
What if it didn’t matter
How I walked
or I talked?

The same for the little boy in class
Who stumbles and falls
Who picks himself up
as everybody laughs.
What if it didn’t matter?

The silent boy
who gazes into space
Not understanding a word
That anyone says.
What if it didn’t matter?

And for the smart one
Who doesn’t mean to show off
but can’t keep her words inside
Anymore.
What if it didn’t matter?

The same for the girl
Who finds herself friendless
Who finds herself “different”
What if it didn’t matter?
‘Cause we’re all different.

So why don’t we accept
each other
For who we are
On the inside
AND on the outside?

Camp Dream Street

This summer, I went to overnight camp for a week at a camp called Camp Dream Street, a camp for kids with physical challenges. Camp was challenging for me. My family and I are very close, so it was hard to be away from them for that long. Also, I have a lot of anxiety, especially at night, because I can’t shut my brain off to fall asleep. There are too many thoughts buzzing around in my head that make me feel a certain way.
   On the other hand, camp was just plain fun. It was also really accepting—I don’t have to worry about anyone being mean or staring, trying to figure me out. My differences don’t get ignored—it becomes a positive thing about me. Instead of, “Hey, why do you wear those AFOs?”, at camp the comment is, “I really like your AFOs. They’re really cool.” I get to meet other kids who understand me and my perspective on being different. It’s a really amazing experience.
  Also, I get to focus on what I like there—arts and crafts, horseback riding, swimming. It isn’t hard to do these things at camp, even though it sometimes is hard at home. The counselors like to help, and they don’t act like it’s a really big deal to help you.
  The people there are some of the most positive people I’ll ever meet. They have their challenge, and instead of dwelling on it, they’re like, “OK, now what?” That is how I want to be.
  Camp is a really positive—and awesome—experience. I can’t wait to go back next year!

Elevator Embarrassment

My cerebral palsy is mild and invisible unless people look at my feet, which turn in most of the time.

My school allows anyone with temporary injuries (broken arms, broken legs) or people with challenges to ride the elevator.
I was tired, so I walked over to the elevator and was about to press the button when a voice startled me.
“Hey!  Didn’t you know that the elevator is for handicapped people’s use ONLY?”
I was flustered, but I didn’t think she deserved the explanation that I had cerebral palsy and sometimes used the elevator when I was tired, so I held up the elevator pass on school ID badge and said, “I have the principal’s permission.”  She nodded and let me go.
That made me nervous even though I knew how to handle it. My sister was with me, and I was a little embarrassed that she had heard that. She gave me a sympathetic look.
Please be nice to people and think about how words affect other people.People will be grateful, and you will save them from hurt feelings and allow them to keep their dignity.